Growing up my parents never forced me to do anything. Like my friends,I wasnt enrolled to any classes. My mother was always out of town and my dad he stayed at another place. So I was always with my brother and my maid at home. I have always been active since kindergarten till now in high school. When I was young I would always run around the house,climbed the pole (yes I was really hyper) my maids had trouble keeping up with my energy. One day when I was running around at the park my neighbour saw me and said to my maid. This girl has too much energy. Ofcourse I was 6 afterall. Growing up i've always wanted to try sports so I joined running when I could in standard 4. I was a sprinter back then and I loved the feeling when I was leading and leaving everyone behind me. I felt like I was running from something that was trying to catch me. So I won medals from my running events during my primary school years.
In secondary school,I was lucky enough to be studying in Sri Aman. It was my dream school. It was a legacy for my family to go there. The girls I mean. In my first year in Sri Aman,I wanted a new identity. So I made friends with some people and I felt like I had to grow up fast. I went out a lot. I was having culture shock. Everything was so different. I met a lot of different kind of people. I mixed with the wrong crowd. I felt like I have something to give. I wanted to be different. I was finding my true self. I got into a lot of trouble but I think everything happens for a reason. And then 2010 came,it was a big year for me. I had to face my PMR year. I slacked off a lot within the first two years of my high school year. So I knew if I wanted the 8A's I had to study hard. I was still trying to find myself. I couldnt concentrate I struggled. So one day in Ramadhan,my mom bought me a book about a girl named Nik Madihah. She came from a poor family and managed to score 20A's for her SPM. It was the way she handled things that caught my attention. I learnt that if I had doubts and uneasy things in my mind. I could always talk to God. So I worked hard for the exam and scored my 8A's. Alhamdulillah. Syukur kepada Allah. So then I wanted to be active in school again. I joined cheerleading. At first my mom didnt want to let me join,I was convinced that she wasnt so sure that I could balance school and cheerleading. As you know cheerleading is such a demanding sport. I fell in love with the sport just like that. I wanted to train hard because I wanted to be the best in the world. My team came in 8th place the first year I joined and 3rd this year. It would be a lie if I said I wasnt dissapointed. My goal was always the champion cup but I knew the other girls worked just as hard and our team had a few mistakes. This year,2012 I will be taking SPM. Probably the biggest examination that I have to take yet. Again I slacked off last year. Maybe I was giving cheer a little too much attention because I wanted to win. I realized now that Education comes first. Cheerleading is second. Im preparing for my exam now. And I hope that I can make my parents proud. Im still finding who I really am. Im still finding the balance in life. I know that Allah will always be on my side guiding my decisions. InsyaAllah I will do my best and I really want to help my family. Now I am ready. My goal now is to get 9A's for my spm and I pray that I could become a better person overall. InsyaAllah.
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