A blessing in disguise?

Hello! Good morning!

I really wanted you to change for the better but you're still the same.old.you

Im done trying. No really I am. 

Here's a piece of advice,

If someone ever makes you feel unworthy,leave them. I have met so many people like that and I can assure you that they are a waste of your time. Dont waste your time trying to please them with a hope that they will change. They just wont. Maybe in my case he never will. You deserve better and you should respect yourself enough to walk away when someone treats you wrongly. Its not healthy. If you have toxic friends and by that I mean friends that make you feel bad about yourself. You have two choices,you can either ignore them or leave them.

Im not trying to sound whiny,im glad that you came into my life so that I would know how to handle people like you in the future. Alhamdulillah for everything!

Superman

You know its him when he makes your heart skips a beat. Funny how fast your heart beats when we're together. Its just adorable to see how nervous you can get. I cherish every moment when we're together but when I think about it again. I cherish our friendship more than our relationship. Maybe because I dont want us to end up like you and her. Its because that I love you too much to let you go. My actions  are not parallel with my desires so who's there to blame? Me. I need to make a decision. A quick one. Whatever happens you know that i'll be here for you.

So cheesy

I was woken up by my superman again. Since I couldnt get myself back to bed. Why not write something about him. I hope he knows how special he is. When you have to choose between being just friends or something more. Which one would you choose?

Decisions. 

2013

Bonjour

I actually wanted to delete my older posts. The past few months have been really challenging no scratch that the past 2 years have been hard. I had to go through a lot of hell but I guess everything is just a blessing in disguise. 

I have learnt to actually accept and love myself for who I really am. I mean come on how can I be so ungrateful im surrounded with so many beautiful and kind hearted people. Some days it gets hard but its important to put yourself first. The naive me thought I have to attend to everyone's needs but you know you just cant do it if you dont feel happy. You cant make someone else happy if you're not happy,true?

I pushed myself so hard,forcing myself to do things that were beyond my capabilities. Not because I was greedy but because I know I can do so much more. Its important to always push yourself but its also important to know your limits. I have so many dreams that I wish to fulfill. InsyaAllah. 2013 will be a year filled with blessings and dreams come true. I am so excited to start studying again. I am so excited for my marathons. I am so excited for the musicals. I am so excited to a brand new year.

I cant say that I hate 2012. It was a tough year but what doesnt kill you makes you stronger right? 

Im grateful.

Solution

Sometimes its normal to encounter sadness inside you.

For the past few months I have been feeling like there is a big dark hole on my heart. In another word I feel useless and helpless. That explains to you why I write so many sad things on my blog. But oh well,life goes on right? I know that no one except for Allah can heal me but im positive that this is just one of the trials that He is giving to me. So fear not,if Allah is by your side you are never lost. So lets make doa for our brothers and sisters. You know its easy to turn to music or to find a partner but I have learnt that none of those worked for me. Well it does but its just temporary.

Its like putting a plaster on your broken heart its temporary 'happiness' but the pain doesnt go away.

The solution?

Turn to Allah,talk to Him. He listens and He is the most Merciful. InsyaAllah we would become happier muslims! :)

Naive or desperate?

Hi hey hello

Okay so today im going to talk about an incident that happened and still is happening right now. Okay I know im in the middle of my exam but I just feel the need to blog about this. Back to the topic,I do not understand how in the world did most of my friends fell for him. Obviously we know that he does not care. Im talking about this particular friend after watching her and listening to her stories. I feel really sorry for her. Not just her actually them. Yes them. They all fell for the same guy and they are all miserable because of him. I just get annoyed really when all they talk about is him. Seriously!? I seriously feel like slapping all of them and I feel like shooting him for making all my friends feel this way. Its not cool when all your friends are talking about this particular boy all the time. Im not just talking about my bestfriends but all!! Ugh love is supposed to give you inspiration. This jerk does not even care about you. Heck he is still figuring himself out. If you my friend are looking for someone to fill the emptiness inside you. That is NOT love. I repeat that is not! It means that you have a low self esteem and you need to figure yourself out and you need to love yourself first. When you dont love yourself thats when you 'terhegeh hegeh' want other people to love you. Think about it if you dont love yourself why would other people love you? Am I right? Okay back to this guy,the worst thing is he is my friend. Ohmygoodness,if I could atleast slap him I would. But no,since there really is nothing that I could hence im writing about it here. Advice pun dah everything else pun dah. You dont want to listen to it and want your life to be miserable then go ahead. Usually I would just ignore these petty things but  I mean come on when everyone(my friends atleast) is talking about a guy every single day atleast for about 1 minute wont YOU get annoyed? I am!

Why do we do that?

Everyone is facing their own struggles. My struggle? To wear a hijab. I was informed that you must first 'hijab' your heart before anything else. I'm learning everyday and I pray to Allah that one day he might just give me the strenght. Its not easy my friends,especially when you have these thoughts inside that are pulling you down. You feel your heart is trying to tell you to do the good things but in your mind ya Allah you just cant stop thinking about 'the people'

What would the people think of me

What would my friends say

Would I get accepted

How do I explain to them

Its funny how we only think about what 'the people' think of us and not the One who created us. Its time that we change our thinking. Why do we do all the things that we do? I think its really important to know the purpose of everything that you do. For example,what is the purpose of your life? Why do you live? Is it just to please others? Is it just to get married and settle down with 7 children? Do you want to be a famous singer and then inspire others? Ask yourself. And then what? What is after that? Whats after getting married? What is after having a successful career? What is after getting known by others? 

They say when you don't ask you don't learn. 

Start asking. Don't be shy. There is no such thing as stupid questions just stupid answers

Wise words

In life you can always retake your exam. When you fail a paper you can always sit for another paper next semester but you cannot retake your exam of the akhirat.